I was in the hospital receiving nutrition from a pict line in my right arm when my GI doc delivered the news that I had Crohn's Disease. 

My first reaction was one of relief...at last, after years of searching and testing, I had an answer to what was wrong with me. My feeling of relief lasted several weeks. With it came the thought, "It's not my fault!"

Not my fault that I have Crohn's Disease, but much more than that...not my fault that, due to the overwhelming fatigue and joint pain I'd been experiencing for years, that I could not volunteer anymore, do many of the activities I enjoyed anymore...like hiking (of course, I am in Northern Illinois...not much hiking up here anyway)...not my fault that working full-time was too exhausting and I could not keep up with the housework.

For years I had counted myself a failure for all of the above. Now, lying in that hospital bed, too weak to even sit up by myself,  I felt free. To be continued.